Disclaimer: I got the idea for this post from Gretchen Rubin’s personal commandments –which she shares in her Happiness Project. I learned so much doing my Life List that I figured I have a go at this as well. (As for the title, I couldn’t resist.)
These ‘’commandments’’ are actually just reminders to myself of the big realizations I’ve had about how to keep myself happy and moving forward.
1) A clear target
Take time to consider what the ultimate situation would be for me and the people I care about. I probably do this 4 or 5 times a week and it’s actually not an easy task. It IS easy to cop-out and say, “mega-rich on a tropical island,’’ but that’s not what I really want.
I try to clarify what my days will be like when I’ve finally arrived in my ideal situation. I want to be able to read the newspaper, eating fruit, in a sunny place. I want to have brilliant friends who I spend a lot of time with. I want to learn a lot every day, as a part of my job. Plus about 50 other things. I think the clearer I can be about precisely where I’d like to end up, the more likely I’ll get there.
2) Something every day
I try to take at least a small step forward, toward my ultimate lifestyle, every day. I put something on my To Do list every day that will prepare me for that situation (I work on a ladder), to make sure I’m moving toward that target.
3) Appreciate it
Just like at Thanksgiving, take a moment to think of something you’re grateful for. It’ll remind you of how far you’ve come and that, while not everything is always perfect, you’re life is mostly pretty good. As my mom used to say on cold winter nights, “be thankful that we have a nice warm place to live.” Or as Socrates said, “He is the richest who is content with the least.”
4) Speak up
I’ve had to learn this lesson a few times in my life –that I need to share my ideas. I need to put my ideas into the world for a few reasons. First, it’s a way to realize what I know and to push my thinking (to be constructive). It’s also a way to connect with people, to build community. The last time I realized this in a big way was my first trip to Australia. There people expect you to have a story to tell. I found I was so used to being a listener that I didn’t know how to tell my stories.
5) Make it a good day
Even on good days, I try to think of one thing that could make the day a little better. If it’s stopping at the store and buying some candy to eat, that’s okay. Whatever can make it a little happier okay. Getting into my pajamas early also makes me happier. The point is that, for me, taking each day as a project works.
6) Sleep on rice
This one comes from a story I heard of a poor immigrant man who slept on rice (with his longsuffering wife) in the back room. He did this for year so that he could save money. Even when he had saved enough to move into an apartment, he didn’t. He continued to make sacrifices until he could buy the store. I’m always inspired by stories of people who have worked harder than they had to, so they could achieve uncommon ends.
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